Some are liars who hide it, and some are liars who claim to have none, but as I consider how I’d lie about my shame, I think I’d choose video games. I love video games. Tactical RPGs are the best fix to funnel your brain cells when they scatter to the edges of your skull. Narrative 3rd Person Shooters are immersive enough to escape the everyday stories in our feed. Yes, we could just put down our phone, but then we couldn’t find that last word in the day’s New York Times puzzle. It wouldn’t be shame if I didn’t like it and it wouldn’t be shame if it didn’t need to hide behind a metaphor. I might play video games at any time of day.
3:00 AM
Enough darkness to fall asleep but daybreak too close to get a full night’s rest. Civilization whispers “one more turn.” A new district will be built, technology unlocked, and a new city will fall to your empire. The plan is clear, tangible, provides immediate feedback, and you can easily put the controller down whenever you want to. Nobody is awake to tell you to stop. Nobody is awake to ask you for anything. Bags and eye strain are problems for the future. Who cares? Just wake up, drink water, eat, function like a responsible adult, and put everything back without leaving a trace. What were you up to? A bunch of nothing. When did you go to sleep? Oh, not too late.
8:00 AM
Weekend? No obligations. Weekday? No meetings. Still in bed and time in ample supply. Open eyelids, tap, tap, tap, pin number, swipe, everyone else has a wonderful life and the world is on fire. How many words can I find in the day’s spelling bee? The crossword should be quick. Why do they make this so hard? They used this clue before and the sun is so bright and my hips don’t want to leave the mattress and I just want to play pattern match on endless mode, but how is it already…
Noon
The body will wither without food. Without food it won’t move. The body must move to get food. How did humans survive the hunter gatherer era? Have we regressed? If I lose to the Act 1 boss in Slay The Spire again, I will crack my phone. That’s a lie. The computer is necessary to beat the boss. Do Not Disturb blocks notifications from dropping in, from disturbing total noise-canceling focus as there’s nothing worse than a phone call right before beating the boss. Keep climbing, looking for the right cards, skipping options that don’t do it for you this time, honing in on the perfect deck, but they don’t come, welp, just settle for what’s available. Why is this fun? The boss was beaten, but in an efficient, do-what-you-gotta-do kind of way. What time is it?
4:00 PM
Close laptop. Eat. Drink. Exercise. Strangers on the internet can still get this work in FIFA. Curve when you shoot, unless there’s time for a power shot. Through balls on the ground. Headers are too unpredictable. These strangers forfeit when losing early and tilt too easily with a properly timed and overly extended dead-fish celebration. After three wins come three losses, but a tie means promotion, so come three more losses and one game left. Do we use the free win? No, that’s for those who don’t deserve it. The next stranger puts up three goals in five minutes and…don’t have time for this, got things to do. Focus on the bigger picture. I sign into my laptop that opens to a big “PLAY” button in the center. Could sneak in another run. Close laptop.
9:00 PM
Would we have more fun if we cared less and didn’t analyze or compartmentalize or intellectualize what made us happy? Maybe the thinking about the thinking is the enjoyment and the games are just a conduit to think in a controlled way in a controlled environment without anyone watching.
Midnight
Long live the single player game.
Just. One. More. Turn.
Love it.
Games are so beautiful.
In some cases they bring me joy as one of the more unexplored art forms.
Some times they serve as a way for me to test ideas that I may want to try one day in the real world, but with much shorter feedback cycles.
Other times they are just a way for me to still my mind by focusing it on an objective that serves as a brief escape from daily life.
I've learned so many life lessons and strategy from games.
Hahaha… NICE!